Monthly Archives

January 2018

How Knowing Your Weaknesses Helps You Reach Your Goals

infp, Weight Loss
chamomile tea with flowers

Maybe it’s because it’s January, maybe the new year gets me, but I’ve been all about reaching my goals this month.  Through the strengthfinder quiz, I discovered one of my biggest weaknesses is focus. My mind can identify 20 different possibilities for a problem, but actually focusing on one of them for the long term is very difficult for me.  So I hired a personal trainer to help me, her job isn’t to teach me to workout or to eat well, although she is super knowledgeable in those areas.  Her job is to keep me accountable and focused, because when it comes to weightloss, steadfastness might count more than self-discipline.  Just doing the same easy but difficult things day after day.  Exercise/eat well, exercise/eat well……

She had me sign up for the myfitnesspal app and she wants me to record everything; it is helping.  It is making me more calorie conscious and it is so hard to be honest on there when I eat something I shouldn’t, but it is working and knowing someone else is seeing it and encouraging me is working for me.

My other weakness is that I’m a people pleaser, but if you know this about yourself, you can use it to your advantage.  I want to please my fitness trainer but I couldn’t care less about pleasing myself when it comes to not eating when I’m hungry.  I know; crazy, but if you’re a people pleaser too, you’ll totally understand where I’m coming from.

Some things I’m doing that are working:

-making exercise simpler, a 20-minute video is good enough, it’s below zero outside. I don’t have to be a runner in freezing cold Kansas.

-cooking big meals on the weekend and eating the same thing all week long.

-asking for help, my mom is helping me out right now with childcare and chores while I’ve taken on an intense class

-almond milk hot cocoa, every night for my after 8 snack.  (cocoa powder/protein powder/erythritol-stevia sweetener)

-spending money on health instead of new clothes.

-the kids’ yoga videos on Amazon prime are adorable and fun, the grown-up videos are pretty awesome too.


Photo by ORNELLA BINNI on Unsplash

What Worked and Didn’t Work For Me in 2017

Boundaries, Career, Divorce

Some things that worked for me in 2017:

Dating my kids.  I’ve started dating my kids, they are entering that older kid phase where sometimes they are too cool for mom and don’t need me as much as they used to.  Our relationship is changing.

I had some wonderful times with my friends from church, I love hanging out with them, also I have become a lot closer with my cousins this past year.

I have gone through extreme depression and a divorce and survived!  I’m now in a weird angry stage where I don’t like people in general and am grumpy with the world.  We’ll call this “grumpy stage”, I don’t know how long it’s going to last, but it’s nice not to be sad all the time and I have hope that this too shall pass.  It’s okay to be grumpy.

Exercise works for me.  When I exercise I’m more happy, when I don’t, I’m not.  Exercise doesn’t seem to help me lose any weight, but it does wonders for my mood.

Acting on my thoughts instead of relentlessly thinking about things to death works for me.  When I just try something, it doesn’t even really matter what it is, if I just do it, I usually get rewarded some how.  Yoga, art, taking a new class…

Even if I don’t always like people right now, when I reach out to them, my day usually gets better.  This gives me hope that I’m not always going to be like this.


Writing.  I’m a writer, I don’t know how to explain it but must write.  It’s not even a conscious choice anymore, just must keep writing??  It has become like breathing to me.

What didn’t work for me in 2017:  

My diet didn’t work.  So I’m hiring a personal trainer to keep me motivated and accountable.  She’s not actually going to work out with me (this is helping with cost), just helping me set goals and keeping me on track.  I think this might be really good for me.

This blog.  I guess being all secretive and not really wanting to share things with the world isn’t working for the success of this blog, haha.

Cooking.  Working and trying to cook isn’t working for us.  The food situation just isn’t working in general.  Plus, we don’t actually eat at home with the whole co-parenting thing that often during the week.   The kids don’t eat when I do cook.  I don’t know what to do?




I used to wear love like an army
I used to know nothing could harm me
Now fear got up all in my head
I’m all in my head, and I made a mess
I confess, I’m ashamed

And I need grace
To step inside my mind and help me be a better person
Release the better version of me
‘Cause right now, what I wanna do is scream it
I need grace ’cause I’m running low on faith
And I really wanna change my heart
‘Cause I’m falling apart these days
And what…

~Rachel Platten “Grace”


Photo by Charles Deluvio on Unsplash,