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Dating

Taking The Next Step

Boundaries, Dating, Devotional, Divorce, Single Mom

Sometimes we have to make hard decisions.  We don’t know the end picture most of the time.  We don’t know how it’s all going to play out.  But we may know the next step.  We know what the next boundary we need to enforce is.  We know when our values are getting stomped on in someway and we need to stand up for ourselves.  We know when a fight needs to have our swords laid down, we might not understand why or how it’s going to work, or if we’re going to win, or if it’s going to hurt us, but that’s not for us.  Only God knows the future, our job is daily steps of faith, listening and obeying.  Doing small hard things we know are what we are being called to do.  This is the walk of a Christian; I think,  leaving the scary to God and trusting Him with the small thing in front of us.

 

 

A Story About My Teenage Years

Dating, Dating after divorce, Friendship, Single Mom

My good friend in high school was outgoing and sweet.  She took over the radio when she was in my car.  We were both “good girls” who didn’t drink and loved Jesus.  But in small towns, everyone hangs out at the drinking parties and goes to football games, so that’s what we did too.  I’ve always loved having a best friend to talk to for hours and I miss that right now.  I miss having someone to walk with and talk to.  I like talking endlessly without thinking about it, Fall days filled with the smell of leaves, hot summer nights filled with stars, we talked through all the seasons.  We also practiced doing handsprings which neither of us ever got good at, but we had lots of bruises.

I always got the boyfriend and left her hanging.  Not sure why I always felt I needed to date someone when many of my friends were content with just being.  Felt like there was always some guy attached to my side.  I missed out on a lot because of those guys.  Wish I’d focused more on experiences in high school.  Wish I didn’t need this romance thing so much.  Wish the goal wasn’t a guy, but a multi-dimensional journey.  An adventure, and if he wants to join me, great.  But  I don’t want the end of my adventure to be a guy.  I want it to be so much more this time.

 

Photo by Bruno Nascimento on Unsplash

Healthy Living and Dating

Boundaries, Dating, Dating after divorce, Single Mom, Weight Loss

I’m surprised by how important health is to me in dating.  It’s in my top 3 things I want.  Not that I’m that great at it, we’re all on a health journey, some much farther than others.  I think the truly important thing is, are you both heading the same way?

Many of us move through dating without really knowing what we want.  Knowing what you want is a gift to the people you love, it helps to reduce later conflict, and it’s an automatic filter to say no to the things you already know you don’t want.  It helps to reduce the pain of not getting what you want.

Know what you really want:  I’m impressed by guys with boundaries, I’m impressed when they tell me no when it comes to making poor choices, it’s nice when the burden isn’t entirely on my shoulders to make healthy choices.  We all mess up and slip, but it’s really nice when you both are at least trying.