One of the most effective things I’ve done as a dating INFP, is to write about my date afterwards. I try to write exactly what happened and what I liked and didn’t like about it. This helps me to not idealize the relationship. It’s also useful for looking back and seeing patterns. I tend to idealize relationships and be incredibly forgiving of flaws because I am a healer and I don’t like conflict or hurting people. But not ignoring little things like “he spent the entire time on his cell phone again” helps me see patterns that push me to get out of relationships that aren’t good for me.
Also, another dating tip I think is useful for the INFP personality is that it’s better to find someone who will support you in who you are and what you do than it is to find someone you’re incredibly impressed with. If you find yourself doing all of the supporting work and not getting any in return, it might be time to find someone new, no matter how cool he is.
As an INFP, I find I’m so open-minded and curious about different people that I have no trouble finding someone to date, I truly love everyone and the more different from me they are, the more curious I am about them. The biggest dating challenge I come across is getting out of relationships I know are not working. It feels morally wrong to break up with someone, but this isn’t true. Finding the right person whose core values match your own is imperative for the infp because our values are such a huge part of who we are, if they don’t like our values, then they don’t really like us.
I’ve also heard that for INFP’s it is good for us to not ignore the boring guy in favor of the exciting guy because their stability allows us to be our full artistic selves, I’m not sure about this one yet. I see wisdom in it, but if there are no feelings for me, I don’t feel like the romance is authentic. He’s got to be a boring guy who creates feelings.
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